Doing the right thing

The most important thing in life is to do the right thing.
That means all the time, not sometimes, not when you feel like it. And not when it's easy.
The right thing is seldom easy.

I'm telling you, in order to remind me.
A few of the trials you're own superman here is going through are testing the limits of doing the right thing.
I've been getting no thanks, no appreciation. In fact on 2 occasions I actually managed to upset someone by helping them out. All part of the trials of life I guess.

So I look at the ring. The superman ring I wear. It's not about being a fan (although I am). It's about remembering to make the right choices, doing the right thing. And not letting people down.

So that's what I'm going to keep doing.

But there are some tough choices, and like a lot of people in life. I need to make a choice. And both choices will cause a problem for someone.

A friend of mine has started seeing someone too young for him. Well technically I think she's too young to be seeing anyone.......... but moving on.

His girlfriend obviously doesn't know. Oh and did I mention she's a friend of mine?

So where's the option here....... I can't betray either one of them. I can't lie to anyone. I can't keep seeing them both and just not say anything.
I think the choice is to stay out of it. And if asked anything, always tell the truth.

Or maybe there isnt a friend. Maybe there isnt a girl.
Maybe I need to say something I can't.
Anonymously, secretly, unread. I still can't confess.

I'll remain only a guest.

Shouldn't she know?

How do people not realise things that are right in front of them.
Things matter in life and a relationship, some things don't.

Conversation matters, interaction and sharing.
This is where it should all start from.

And yet some people have lists.
Items jotted down, a post it note in the back of your brain.

Must like dogs. Must go windsurfing.
I want someone who writes.

Maybe criteria can be useful, and negative criteria I'm all for.
I see no problem with having traits you don't want in a partner.

But having a list of what I should live up to........ that's like picking your meals based on a pre-defined list. Regardless of what you feel like or how hungry you are.

I guess spending hours locked in coversation isn't important to some people. Or maybe it is and there's something I don't match up to......

Does an average looking guy need to do much to entertain a woman?

Now this leads me to my second point, and this one is going to be the cause of much upset, maybe for many people.


I am NOT trying to impress you. This is not how relationships work.
As a man, I will choose if I am interested in a woman, I will show interest, I will share my good side, I will make sure she knows my negative traits and dark secrets. (why risk things going bad later)

This does not mean I go out of my way to impress you and you do nothing for me.
Sorry sweetheart, pick someone else.

Message to the last woman I dated.......You needed to impress me as much as I needed to impress you. And sorry to say......... You didnt do so well.

I can't complain too much though.

After all I'm only a guest.

Things pile up sometimes.........

People often say life can sneak up on you.
I was never sure what it meant. Does it mean I'm waiting for a bus one day and BAM a job and a family sneaks up behind me.

But I guess it does.
Despite the blogs here, and trust me, life is very different to portrayed here. I was cruising along.
Dream job, time of my life.
I quit smoking, I started running, working out.

Everything sails along, meet some women, go out with some friends. And then my mighty tower started to lean.

A few loose bricks here and there........ some cracked mortar..............

Bigger hurdles.

I start to deal with someone I work with who goes out of his way to make my job difficult.
Literally, this man is over 30 and one of the other managers. And behaviour exhibited would get my children grounded.....

Then I meet the girl.
We worked together months ago, 18 months ago. Then we run into each other.

A coffee is arranged, a meetup, something casual for a "hi, how are you?"
We meet-up. A casual hello, and we sit down to order coffee..... 5 hours later we havent left the cafe/restaurant.
We've ordered a meal, looked into each others eyes, talked, rejoiced, regaled each other with tales.

I never imagined we had so much in common, so much alike, so many things to agree on and share. Like no-one else I've ever met.

A proper date is arranged. Dinner.
Once again, it all goes well, hours of company and conversation.
Twice more, then we see a movie, distance.................

Completely uncommited, no answers, no feelings, nothing close.
Mixed signals, moving too fast, talks about someone else missing out because of not moving fast enough.
A step back, she asks me out again, wants to see me more, gets flirty, asks me if Ive thought about her, wants details, wants more, compliments, looks, wants to know she's wanted.

Then suddenly back to we're just friends, I dont want more, I need my space.............

And everything raised or directed from her side is thrown back at me. You did this, you spoke about this, said that............

The smart thing to do is walk away, she's not interested.........

I cant just drop it, she's not trying to hurt me. I've not told her I think any more of her than she thinks of me. I've not said anything done has hurt.

I'll smile and carry on, after all. I need to make someone smile, even if its not me.